What are you doing July 12th?

I don't know about you, but I'll be getting married.  Yep, married.

I'm sure I know the next question.  "You met her years ago online, then met for an amazing week in Paris. Later you even moved to Germany to be together.  So... how did you propose?" 

Ah yes, there we were in Switzerland over the Easter holiday.  We had just spent nearly a week driving from Tuscany to the Swiss Alps where we were to conclude our vacation with a few days skiing.  We reached the top of the slope and gathered ourselves for a few moments before taking off.  This was most likely our last run before heading home the next day.  It was late afternoon and the sun was getting low in the sky.  We leaned forward and pushed off.

Halfway down this particularly long run is a small chalet overlooking the valley.  It is a good place to stop and take in the view over a hot chocolate.  As we zigzagged downhill, we looked to one another and nodded.  Let's stop there for one last time.  We stood on the balcony sipping our hot chocolate and watching as the sun began to dip into the horizon.  I knew this was it.  I waited until her attention was drawn by passing skiers when I reached into my coat pocket.  When she turned back to look at me, I dropped to one knee and asked her to marry me.* 

If only it went like that.  It seems that all your life you think the moment is going to be something like that.  Some sort of grand, sweeping gesture.  A story your family can pass along for generations.  Well, I hate to say it, but ours came about in the most ordinary of fashion.  But then again, maybe we needed something like that, something ordinary.  As my sister said to me, there isn't that much ordinary about how our relationship came together and that maybe we've had enough of the "big" moments for the time being.  She may have a point there. 

Nope, this one came about during the course of a long conversation.  I'm not even sure what the original topic was.  I'm sure we were just talking about work, or to be more honest, complaining about work.  One thing led to another and eventually I said something like "we should get married."  "Ok!" she said.  And that was that.  I'm serious.

Thus began a flurry of activity, most of which involved running back and forth to the Standesamt (registry office) here in Cologne.  For all that we've read, it really was not as difficult a process as we had thought.  Either it really wasn't that difficult, or we have just built up a tolerance to a certain amount of bureaucracy here.  All in all, I think we counted three trips to the Standesamt together.  Although we thought we had all the necessary paperwork, it turns out we needed two other documents.  One was an officially translated version of my birth certificate.  That wasn't difficult to obtain, although it wasn't all that cheap.  The second document needed was an affidavit from the US Consulate stating that I am not currently married in the US.

Unfortunately, that meant an extremely early morning trip to Frankfurt where the nearest Consulate is located.  (There's actually one in Dusseldorf which would have been a lot more convenient, but apparently it is only for emergency situations.)  I made an appointment online using the consulate website.  I printed out the official appointment confirmation which seemed to threaten me with endless bureaucratic delays if I failed to show up for my scheduled time.  My appointment time was 9:30 in the morning.  Of course the Consulate is no where near the center of town so this meant dealing with local public transportation in Frankfurt as well.  After doing all the math, we decided we needed to be on a train around 6:30 in the morning.

Let me just say this.  If you need non-emergency Consulate services and are an American citizen, don't get so worked up about the appointment time.  When we arrived at the building nearly an hour early there was a huge line in front.   This line, however, was for non-US citizens seeking travel visas.  I was able to walk right up to the counter using the line for citizens.  I showed them my scheduled appointment and asked if I should come back later because I was too early.  Instead, he told me to walk right in.  So there you go.  I'm pretty sure I didn't even need to make an appointment.  I probably spent no longer than a half hour inside. 

For all my complaining about the people who work in the Auslanderbehorde, the people at the Standesamt in Cologne couldn't have been any friendlier.  But maybe that comes with the territory.  At one point, as we were signing some of the final documents, the official turned to me and asked (in German of course) "You do realize you are getting married, not simply buying a washing machine, don't you?"

We were told it would take 3-4 weeks before we could take the next step.  Instead, it only took about 2 weeks until the letter arrived stating that we could return to the Standesamt to pick out the wedding day.  We settled on the 12th of July. 

So that's it.  We've turned everything in. We've paid all the requisite fees.  We've bought the rings.  The only thing left to do now is wait.  If you're not doing anything on the 12th of July, why not swing by city hall and wish us luck? 

*Thanks to a good friend for inspiring that story.